body metamorphosis

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Ahhhhh getting pregnant… Lot’s of women and moms let their friends and peers think that everything surrounding pregnancy is glorious. Filled with tons of “50 Shades of Grey” sex and glowing from head to toe. Well I’m here to tell you that the process of getting preggo isn’t glamourous and neither are the 10 months that follow. Well to me at least…

So what happens when you finally get pregnant? It can be joyous and exciting about the what’s about to happen in the coming months. Will I get morning sickness? Will my skin glow like JLo? Will I be a righteous bitch? We don’t really know until we get into the pregnancy. For me, the concern that plagues me when I get pregnant is the thought of my body changing.

Throughout my childhood and my adulthood, I have struggled with my weight. 10 lbs up or 20 lbs down has been the story of my life, or rather my ass. I was never the girl that didn’t have to think about what I ate. My adolescence was plagued with yo-yo dieting and jumping on to any fad diet band wagon.

It wasn’t until after my first pregnancy with Annabelle, that I truly found eating habits that were healthy and worked for me. However, at the same time, when I was pregnant with A, I gained 70 lbs which brought up all of my neurosis and anxiety around gaining weight. Feeling uncomfortable in my clothes, hating looking in the mirror, and feeling self conscious around my husband are all things I experienced with this weight gain. So I swore that I wouldn’t let my voracious hormonal hunger get the better of me in the next pregnancy.

Unfortunately, with my second, the weight is again sticking like glue, albeit not as much as the first. Acknowledging this fact, I have resigned to the fact that I am not the pregnant woman who only wears maternity jeans in her 8 month, but rather in her 3rd… and that’s OK.

We are all different and comparing myself to my pregnant counterparts will do nothing but disallow me to enjoy the fun that does come with being pregnant. Feeling the kicks, seeing my little one’s excitement with her burgeoning sisterhood, and feeling comfortable in my temporarily Botticelli-esque body are all things that now are to become my focus.

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